The Three C’s Before Holy Matrimony

Lessons on Preparation Conviction and Purpose from Esther

Before you walk in Holy Matrimony, God is far more concerned with who you are becoming than what you are pursuing. Throughout Scripture preparation always comes before promotion and purpose always precedes partnership.

In Esther 2:2 and 2:3 KJV we see that before Esther was ever revealed to the king she was gathered set apart and submitted to a season of intentional preparation.

Then said the king’s servants that ministered unto him Let there be fair young virgins sought for the king. And let the king appoint officers in all the provinces of his kingdom that they may gather together all the fair young virgins unto Shushan the palace to the house of the women unto the custody of Hege the king’s chamberlain keeper of the women and let their things for purification be given them.

Esther did not rush into her calling. She submitted to the process. Later she submitted again at great personal cost.

The Three C’s God Establishes First

Clarity: God gives clarity of your identity in Christ. Esther knew who she was and whose she was before stepping into her assignment. Identity clarity produces wisdom humility and discernment. Marriage requires this same clarity.

Covenant: God establishes a covenant relationship with Himself as the foundation for your life. Before Esther entered covenant with the king, her life was already surrendered to God. Marriage is not meant to replace intimacy with God but to flow from it.

Conviction: God forms conviction over comfort producing an unshakable desire to trust honor and obey Him even when obedience requires sacrifice.

Esther’s greatest act of preparation was not beauty or position but conviction. When her people were threatened she submitted herself to sacrifice understanding that her marriage was about purpose.

In Esther 4:16 KJV she declares

Go gather together all the Jews that are present in Shushan and fast ye for me and neither eat nor drink three days night or day I also and my maidens will fast likewise and so will I go in unto the king which is not according to the law and if I perish I perish.

Esther risked her life. She submitted her comfort safety and future to the will of God. Her marriage became a vehicle for deliverance.

Submitting to the Preparation Process

Practical Strategies

• Embrace hidden seasons: Esther’s preparation happened away from public view. Hidden seasons refine character and deepen trust in God.

• Accept divine boundaries: God often restricts access before He grants influence. Boundaries protect purpose.

• Submit to godly counsel: Esther listened and applied wisdom. Spiritual covering sharpens discernment and guards destiny.

• Practice spiritual discipline. Prayer fasting and obedience strengthen conviction and courage.

Understand that marriage carries mission. Godly marriage is not just about companionship but alignment with purpose and advancing God’s will.

Final Reflection

Esther teaches us that preparation shapes destiny and conviction unlocks purpose. Before Holy Matrimony, God establishes Clarity Covenant and Conviction so that marriage becomes more than romance.

Preparation is not delay.

It is divine positioning.

Call to Action

If this message resonates with you, take time this week to pause and seek clarity. Reflect on what God has revealed to you about clarity and your identity in Him, covenant, conviction, and your posture toward holy matrimony. Write down what He has shown you about your faith, your obedience, and the areas where He is calling you into greater alignment. Pray over these revelations and allow them to refine your heart and prepare you for the next season He is leading you into.

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